I like this blog, but it's been a little sweet lately. Crafts and delicious food and friends and poems are alright and all, but there's only so much of that that I can handle. So please take some makes-you-feel-like-a-bad-person joy in the following links:
How to Tick People Off
some of my favorites:
Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
Staple pages in the middle of the page.
Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints at the cash register.
Ask people what gender they are.
Sing along at the opera.
and
List of Unusual Deaths
some of my favorites (don't you dare judge me)
207 BC: Chrysippus died of laughter after giving his donkey wine then seeing it attempt to eat figs.
1814: On October 17th [my birthday!], 9 people died when 323,000 gallons of beer burst their vats and gushed into the streets of London.
1940: Marcus Garvey died as a result of two strokes after reading a negative premature obituary of himself.
1974: Basil Brown, a 48-year-old health food advocate, drank himself to death with carrot juice.
1991: Carl Hulsey, 77, was butted to death by a pet goat he had been training to act as a "guard dog".
1998: An entire visiting soccer team playing against Basanga was killed by lightning during a match. Everyone on Basanga, the home team, survived.
2010: Jimi Heselden, owner of Segway, was killed when he accidentally drove off a cliff on a Segway at his estate and drowned.
2011: Jose Luis Ochoa, 35, died after being stabbed in the leg at a cockfight by one of the birds that had a knife attached to its limb.
