Interculture part deux

^^^only your siblings know what parading around in matching star-spangled shirts feels like^^^

Last Diwali I mentioned that Premal and I were trying to figure out how we would navigate the blending of our customs--especially when it comes to festivals and celebrations. Well, we're back for round two of our little experiment, and it's a good one.

Rakhi is the Hindu celebration of protective siblings. Traditionally, sisters give their brothers little bracelets to thank them for their guardianship, and receive sweets and gifts in return--because sisters are treasures, and should be treated as such. I'm all for being a treasure, but you can, of course, count on me to make things a bit more gender neutral. Because you have never seen a more protective mama bear than sweet Charity Sunshine up against a prospective beau (I'm pretty sure she once told Premal she would cut his hmm-hmm off if he ever hurt me). And there have definitely been times when I watched over Shiloh like he was a peony in full bloom.

So instead, we've chosen to celebrate by taking a few moments to reflect on how awesome our siblings are, and to thank them (by sending a little friendship bracelet in the mail) for all they do to ensure that we grow to meet our greatest potentials.


^^^ it gave me a great excuse to whip out my long dormant bracelet-making skillz^^^

So, here goes nothing.

Thanks for reading to me, and reading with me, and giving me great books to read to myself. Thanks for the sweet hand-me down t-shirts (and the not so sweet hand-me-down leggings). Thanks for teaching me how to cook and fight and whistle and fish. Thanks for driving me places, and driving me crazy. Thank you for the punches you've thrown (and taken) on my behalf. Thanks for teaching me about music and not freaking out (too much) when I dated your friends. Thanks for giving me a shoulder to cry on when I needed it, and a bop in the nose when I'd sobbed you soggy. Thanks for believing in me, and inspiring me to be more like each of you. I'm so lucky to have each of you in my life. I love you. Happy Rakhi.

xoxox,
Libby

^^^look at my dreamy model. look at him!^^^

Now I have to actually stick these buggers in the mail....

Harry Potter + Marie Antoinette = Quebec

Mercina has a special knack for making everything around her lovely. If you doubt me--or would simply like to look at a lot of pretty things--just browse through her posts. They offer a disgustingly accurate window into the world of magic she creates. We, the players in her land of dreams, tend to vacillate between modes of deep feeling, either of gratitude for sharing her gift with us, or inadequacy over our inability to pass muster. 

So it was with some apprehension that Glorianna, Charity and I endeavored to arrange a sweet little send off worthy of miz. Mia Grace. Our inspiration was simple. Two beloved films, Harry Potter and (Sofia Coppola's) Marie Antoinette. Combined they make Harie Antoinette, a hedonistic celebration of opulence and magic (but mostly mass consumption of pastel-colored candy and movies). My sparsly furnished apartment provided a perfect pallet for a grown up slumber party, with homemade butter-beer for sipping, and delectable lil' cakelettes for snacking. We rallied our creative forces to whip of some snazzy garlands, and laid a lush carpet of faux fur. Then we dolled ourselves up and danced around for no one's gratification other than our own.  Most of us had snoozed off by the time Harry discovered what lay hidden beneath the trapdoor on the third-floor of Hogwarts, but that seemed somehow appropriate for the evening.

It was a night like so many others we've shared, which was exactly what we had hoped it would be. It's terrible saying goodbye to someone you love so dearly. It will be nearly six-months before we get to hear her voice again, and then a year more before she returns from her mission and we learn how she, and we, have changed in the interim. But in the meantime I'm grateful that we were able to pull off a fette worthy of the Queen of Aesthetics herself, and bolster us all with one more memory to treasure during the cold Canadian winter ahead.

We love you Mercina Grace! Be safe, and kind, and know how adored you are!
xoxox

Outtakes

 Last month we expended herculean efforts while wrangling the troupes to take a family picture. With 23 bodies to organize - and at least as many schedules - finding a time and place to gather was darn near impossible (please see the gory 75-long gmail message thread for evidence). In the end, everyone was able to make it except for Dave (who was whisked away on a last minute assignment in NYC), and little Thomas (who was needed at the opening of his preschool art installation). And in my humble opinion, the heartaches and headaches were totally worthwhile. We'll wait until Christmas to subject everyone to the finished product, but - until then - here are some of my favorite outtakes from the afternoon. 
Huge props, hugs, and kisses to Tom who was coerced into taking the pictures after we were unable
to secure a professional photographer for the golden 45 minute window of opportunity. (Apparently 

this studly rocket scientist is also capable of corralling 21 of the most opinionated people I've ever 
had the pleasure of knowing). Huzzah!     

Bundling Blossoms

Happy Spring! I am very ready for some warmer weather (New Haven is still freezing), so I'm hoping the official arrival of spring will result in warmer temperatures. Fresh flowers are such a joy - and when I was home in Colorado over spring break, I indulged my obsession of flower arranging. I picked up a delightful assortment of blossoms at the supermarket. They were lovely....And they called to me....

• Spray roses = $8
• Snap Dragons = $8
• Cool green blooms (not sure what they're called) = $4
• Red berries = $4
• Daisies = $5
• White roses & baby's breath = from my sweet boyfriend
• Baby daffodils = from our garden

          Total = $29

My rules for buying flowers -

They must strike me as being especially pretty

They must be very fresh

They should be a good deal (I usually get them from the grocery store)

The easiest way to make a lovely arrangement is to get all the same color of flower or all the same type of flower

I always try to stick to a pretty explicit color palate (e.g. pink/yellow/white/cream, red/white/blue, etc.)

The first thing I do after returning with my spoils is find vases for them. I usually try a few before I'm happy. If the arrangement is going to be involved, I stick with a simple vase. If the flowers are on the simpler size, I tend to use more exciting vases.  

Before doing any arranging, I set the flowers in the vase(s) - just to see how they look. 

Sometimes this is *almost* all I do with flowers. A lot of flowers look lovely by themselves in a vase. If I like how they look by themselves, I simply chop off the bottoms of the flowers at an angle -to the desired length, and put them in the a vase full of water.  

If I'm not wholly satisfied with a simple arrangement, I decide what shape of arrangement I want to make. Then I figure out which vase I want to fill - and choose the flowers I want in the center of my arrangement. An old art teacher told me to build my paintings out from the center; that's what I do when I arrange flowers, too. I start with the nucleus and carefully build from there - adding blossoms as I go. I try to use an odd number of each type or color of flower to keep things looking natural.

I alternate between different flowers and sizes. I try to pay attention to the shape of the arrangement, and do a lot of bundling - with rubber-bands and twine - to keep things nice and tight. 

When I have a nice bundle, I put the flowers in my vase, and add loose blossoms and leaves around the edges until the vase is comfortably full.  

I filled 7 vases!

A few of my favorite flowers - and a few more helpful tips for arranging flowers at home.

Ahhh.

I love Spring!

Notes from and Indian bride part 3

I was going to try to explain the whole Hindu-wedding shabang to y'all, but then I remembered that for our Wedding Premal put together a really lovely guide to the many rituals that make up the marriage ceremony. And so I present to you--

Dr. P's Guide to a Hindu Wedding

A Hindu marriage is a mental, physical, and spiritual union of two souls, as well as a bond between two families. The wedding ceremony is based on sacred scriptures written in Sanskrit, known as the Vedas, which date back several thousand years. The sacred fire that will be established in the Mandap symbolizes the illumination of the mind, knowledge and happiness, and is considered to be an eternal witness to the holy union as it progresses

Fresh flowers signify beauty

Coconut and Rice signifies fertility

Jaggery and grains signify the food necessary for life

Ghee is offered to the sacred fire

Sindhoor placement on the head signifies change in status to being married. 

Milni ~ Arrival and Welcoming of the Groom’s Family

Premal and his family and friends are welcomed by Liberty's family at the entrance of the temple.  This serves often as the first meeting of the extended family members and friends of both families.  Aarti (prayer) will be performed and the bride and groom are blessed with flower petals.

Ganesh Puja ~ Prayer to Ganesh

The wedding ceremony, like all big events in Hindu culture, begins with a prayer to Lord Ganesh, the remover of obstacles, for the successful completion of the ceremony and to bless the couple with happiness, peace, and prosperity throughout their lives together.

Arrival of the Bride

The bride is escorted to the Mandap by her brothers.  A veil is drawn between the couple. A custom originating in ancient India, when the groom would not have seen the bride until the moment the cloth is lowered!

Kanyadaan~ Giving of the Bride

Liberty’s mother offers her daughter's hands and asks him to accept her as his equal in their life together. While the Jaimala serves as a promise of the union, this sweet gesture literalizes it.  The bride's mother entrusts the groom with her care for the rest of their lives.

Ganthibandhan~ Tying the Knot

Premal's sister (or in this case cousin) ties the corner of Liberty's sari to Premal's scarf as a symbol of their sacred and permanent union as husband and wife.  This is an important step following which the two will truly function as one unit. 

Mangalsutra Dhahran

The groom ties a Mangalsutra (a sacred necklace) around his wife’s neck while uttering - “May you live long by wearing this sacred Mangalsutra, the reason of my life”.  The mangalsutra symbolizes the unending nature of the love that exists between a husband and wife and is therefore also considered a talisman to overcome challenges that the couple may face in the future.

LajaHoma~ offering of Puffed Rice to Sacred fire

Liberty’s brothers pour laja (puffed rice) into the hands of the Bride and Groom to offer to the fire. The priest offers prayers to dispel darkness and ignorance from the couple's life and to lead them to an enlightened state.

MangalPhera ~ Walking around the Fire

Premal and Liberty walk around the sacred fire seven times. Liberty taking the lead for the first three rounds, symbolizing Dharma (righteousness), Artha (accomplishment), and Kama (energy and passion) before handing off to Premal for the next four rounds, which symbolize Moksha (spiritual liberation).

Sindhoora Arpana and Ring Exchanges

The tradition of Sindhoor comes from the Harappan civilization.  The bright red color of sindhoor signifies the blood that allows all of us to live.  The groom applies Sindhoor to his bride's forehead, signifying that she is a married woman, and that he will cherish her like his own life. The couple also exchanges rings.

Presentation of the Couple

Premal and Liberty leave the Mandap as husband and wife as the priest and guests offer their blessings.

More wedding pictures here, here and here!

I've included Dr. P's complete guide after the jump for anyone interested. It's a bit long, but then so is the ceremony, and as someone who learned a lot from it, I think it's worth reading.

Notes from an Indian bride part 2

When our photographer asked where I'd like to have our morning photo session my response was immediate, Bartholdi park. The park is a spectacular little oasis nestled between the federal office building where I got my first job, the building where my grandfather worked, the botanic gardens, and the US Capitol. It is my favorite nook. The park is dedicated to (and graced by a breath-taking fountain by) Frédéric Auguste Bartholdi, the artist who designed the Statue of Liberty, which I find quite fitting. 

We took a lot of pictures, as you might imagine, and most of them were pretty traditional, but I really love these goofy ones. In fact, if I had to pick only one set to have forever, the silly snaps would win hands down.  I feel they capture our friendships so sweetly, and I have plans in the works to make frame them as a set.

All photos by the ever talented Harsheet Patel

Finally, I want to note that yes, there is a distinct absence of Dr. P in these pictures. We decided to get ready with our own families and not see one another until the ceremony. So due to my lack of creativity when it comes to sorting through a thousand pictures, I'm posting in semi chronological order. Which means that my groom will be in the next batch! For those who missed this first round, you can find them here.