Last summer in Korea, I saw a sign for The Baby Lounge; a gaudy neon baby bottle flickered in its window while a throbbing dub-step remix of Baby Beluga beat on its door. I can only assume the club was filled with "cool" infants, kicking to the music from their patent leather exersaucers in between sips of apple juice-tinis. I shook my head at the dissolution of pastel colors, stuffed dinosaurs, and blankies. Last Thanksgiving, I walked in on Charlotte, Princess H's favorite doll, like this:
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| Apparently, her habit cost her a role in Toy Story 3. |
Where have guilelessness and naivete fled? Have the uncorrupted and the new lost their sanctity? I was impelled to philosophize on innocence, sin, and their respective natures. I worried that my dear niece and nephews may have been poorly influenced by their delinquent toys or their overly-matured peers. I started to see signs of their moral corrosion everywhere I turned.
Just look:
Just look:
Keep on eye on those babies.
Otherwise they'll end up like my bum brother C.
Laughing so hard right now!!
ReplyDeleteAlso, you can bet Charlotte and I will be having a very stern conversation...
AGAg! This is too amazing for words. You are my hero.
ReplyDeleteThis just made my day...OH FIVE. You're brilliant.
ReplyDeleteSloth!!!!
ReplyDeleteI laughed at least 8 times while reading this!
Not like "ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha" 8, but 8 separate sets of laughter, each of which contained a large number of individual "ha" sounds or equivalent.
Despite his (i'm sure unjustified) conviction, that last guy is very handsome. . .
ReplyDeletethis is way too funny!!!
ReplyDeleteI am currently experiencing baby lust.
ReplyDeleteIs that last picture a shot of Lincoln? If so, he looks so incredibly different! Has it really been so long since I moved to California?
ReplyDeleteA few things.
ReplyDelete-Yes, Lulu, that is he. Amazing, right? We miss you like crazy. Please come back right away.
-When and where was that topless picture of my crazy son taken? He looks absolutely crazy.
-I am a little freaked out by how much I look like Z in that last picture. I realize, age-wise, it MUST be me. I am disturbed....
oh my gosh that is the best post ever. and One, I would kick Charlotte out of the house for that type of behavior.
ReplyDeleteI like Charlotte.
ReplyDeleteI couldn't figure out how a baby who looked so much like C could be held by a years-older Z. One, thanks for clearing up my brain fog.
Five, this confirms my growing opinion that you are a genius. Also that Princess H and the boys are the cutest little beings EVER.
The "Wrath" photo is now one of by desktop backgrounds.
ReplyDeleteThis is hilarious. Down with delinquent baby toys! (And btw, I'm Meghan, a friend of 2's from the DC days)
ReplyDeleteWoe! I thought it was Brother Z. Crazy ... And when I realized it was Brother C in jail, I couldn't believe I missed it. Then I remembered how appropriate a setting it was. :) This picture is about the time I came on board. So cool.
ReplyDeleteFive, what a funny post. Love, love, love and laughed right along with everyone else, albeit three months later. I was sans computer when this posted.